3 Ways to Keep It Real
We all know the common term “practice what you preach,” but often times it’s easier said than done. Though I am blessed to know so many coaching skills and exercises around transitions, two things remain true; I fail at implementing those tools all the time and I’m constantly learning.
After the initial high of bringing home Norah, I found myself in some similar behaviors that always leave me and the people around me anything but happy. You know, micromanaging Tyler’s every move, being anything but patient, and overall cranky. I tend to get hyper controlling when I feel myself feeling out of control. Can anyone else relate? I was out of alignment in a big way. It got me thinking, what are the 3 bigs things I can I practice in finding my way back to myself?
Take inventory. I just need to write down how I’m feeling. Sometimes that’s a journal entry, others its simply a list of things that are pissing me off. Taking inventory is a great way to help put your thoughts in order.
Fact or fiction. Once I’ve taken inventory of the things that are under my skin, I start dissecting what I’m working with. What things are actually fact and happening and what things are personal feelings and what are the stories that might be triggering me?
Accountability. Instead of coming up with my super annoying nagging list of the things Tyler could do to make me feel better, I look to myself. What is in my control? What practices have I stopped doing that might be contributing to the way I’m feeling? What tools do I have at my disposal? 9 times out of 10 I’ve stopped doing the things I need to do for myself - and that makes me aggravated.
Having the tools to guide you back into alignment is a process that we cover in coaching. You can apply these tools to any transition you might be experiencing in life. Replace Tyler with your boss, a client, a deadline, anyone or thing else that might bend you out of shape from time to time. If you want to find the tools to help you get back to yourself or find enjoyment in your everyday life, I encourage you to carve out some space for a consultation.
Before I end this journal entry, I want to remind you that it's okay to not be okay. No one is perfect. I too am constantly working at these elements of my life, and that’s why I wanted to share this with you. Bringing a newborn home in the midst of a pandemic and wildfire season was a subtle reminder that it’s imperative to recenter yourself. Don’t forget that we coach in terms of “best care scenario,” and you can't always execute that way!
<3 BJS