Finding My Why - Part Two
Why does money always get in the way? Slowly, opportunity and my competitive spirit started dragging me back into the world of styling. At this point, I was pregnant and we had just moved to Los Angeles. I was living in an AirBnB trying to balance starting a new career and being pulled back in by an old one. Things were in chaos. Then boom! I go to the doctor for a routine check-up and I don't get to leave for three months. If you choose to continue following along with this story, I'll go back to that part later and give you the details, but that's another post entirely. There I was sitting in a hospital bed doing my best to stay calm, unstressed, and positive, and I didn't have the mental energy for anything more than self-healing.
If you’re just getting here - welcome! I highly suggest you get up to speed with a 5-8 minute read of “Part One.”
Fast forward a few months and I'm at home with my husband and beautiful and healthy baby boy! Goal achieved. I'm a mama, right?! Three months in, and I was completely spun. Holy shit, this hard. You buy every damn gadget on the market to make mothering easier, breastfeed until you're in tears, read all the books, and go to the baby group. You love this little stranger so hard it actually hurts, and the person you once were, the voice you once had, the body you once had, it's all changed. Your world is flipped upside down.
I can't tell you how hard it was going from being a career woman to a full-time mommy. It stripped me of so many things that made me whole, but it also filled me with so much love. I wasn't depressed, but I was ashamed to admit I wasn't enjoying the baby stage. One night/early morning at 3am I remember Googling, “Does anyone else hate the baby stage?” That night I found out I was a toddler mom, LOL!
Thank God, I wasn't alone. But as I searched online for real support, I fell flat looking for the actual help. I didn't have postpartum, but my reality was not matching the vision or story I had told myself about motherhood. My family dynamics had changed. Guilt and shame crept in about not being a good enough mother, and this unexplainable push-pull of wanting my son close but also needing space started to happen. Where was the gadget to put me back together, where was my fucking ‘lovely’?!
Thus my journey had begun - working on my second life. I was getting clearer on not just wanting my new career, but my whole life vision. And that meant putting in the work. Taking countless hours of training, working with both paid and unpaid clients, working with a coach, a therapist, human design reader, digging deep to find my authentic voice. They say you make your best client and they couldn't be more right. I, too, was a transition I had to work through. And now, it has become more evident that the client I wanted to coach, consult, and support was new moms.
The Offering
Here we are. I help new moms prepare for motherhood, successfully navigate one of the biggest transitions of their lives, emerge from the weeds, and rediscover themselves and their vision for the future postpartum through 1 on 1 coaching or group coaching.
1 on 1 consulting is perfect for new moms looking to start a new business that fits their unique family needs and dynamics. Or moms who need help setting new goals and boundaries as they re-enter the workforce.
Through coaching we will cover:
Changing family dynamics
Prioritizing your new values
Ambivalence & the push-pull of a child (wanting them close but needing space)
Fantasy vs. Reality: Expectations and ideas for motherhood
Guilt, shame and are we good enough (identity work)
Moving past our obstacles
Finding our inner voice
Goals setting and accountability
Carving out your new role as a mother
Setting boundaries
Communicating your new needs
Pivoting careers
Setting boundaries as you re-enter the workforce after maternity leave
The Wrap Up
I believe there's so much good that can happen when we stop thinking of transitional moments, whether career or personal, merely as crises and start seeing them for what they are: opportunities.
<3 BJS